The Dispensary

I've been thinking that there should be a special place where you go to receive bad news, like a special Department or Office, or even Clinic or Dispensary. There should be an official looking summoning, exquisitely printed, embossed even, or perhaps a personalized phone call from a calm, softly spoken representative, requesting  that at such and such an hour at such and such a place you should present yourself, with a form of picture ID, because unfortunately the universe has gone a bit crazy, some stuff's happened, and well, sorry to say but we have some bad news for you. So you go, feeling nervous and anxious, because, although this might have happened before it's still not a very pleasant experience, rather like going to the dentist's. Even people who have received bad news in the past, and have learned to accept it, still feel a shiver of apprehension down the spine when they grip the envelope or pick up the phone and here the soothing muzak and the calm voice asking you to please hold for a moment. Once you arrive you check in, they're very busy and there are always people waiting, but the staff are courteous and professional in a doctor's waiting room way. They sit you down and tell you the bad news, they give it to you straight, no messing around. Then it's up to you, cry, scream, pass-out, go into denial, throw things (they have a wide selection of things to throw), curse God...whatever you want, go ahead, nobody will judge you based on your reactions, you don't have to worry that someone might misunderstand, the attendants are highly trained and have seen it all before, they are unshakable. After a short while you will be offered tissues to dry the tears and shoulders to cry on, genuine understanding and empathy is available 24/7. Surrogate mothers, fathers, husbands and wives are at you disposal, as are many variations of pharmaceutical palliatives, your choice, it's on the house. But, no sharp objects, razor blades or knives, no means of permanently ending the pain are available, you're just going to have to go home and figure that problem out for yourself.